I have some questions for you to think about today:
Are you the kind of person who takes responsibility for your actions, learns from your mistakes, and chooses to move forward? This is the way that happy and successful people generally operate.
Or are you the kind of person who thinks that life happens to you, makes excuses, and feels that things are out of your control? This is the way that unhappy and unsuccessful people generally operate.
You have the power to make choices.
Will you be a happy and successful person with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD)? Will you build your knowledge and awareness? Will you take responsibility for your actions? Will you commit to learning and moving forward?
Or will you make excuses?
One of the best things about being diagnosed with ADD is that you finally have an *explanation* for many of the challenges you experience in life. A huge weight is lifted when you can say to yourself:
“So this is why it’s hard for me to get started and follow through! This is why it’s hard for me to pay attention in meetings! This is why it’s hard for me to get to bed on time!”
Successful adults with ADD take these explanations and turn them into helpful tools. They use this awareness to make good choices, and put themselves in a better position to succeed.
Unsuccessful adults with ADD take these explanations and use them as excuses. They justify their actions (or lack of action) instead of taking responsibility for them. They throw their hands in the air, give up their personal power, and surrender to circumstance.
Excuses don’t help us make change or allow us to grow; they provide us with a way out. They give us a reason to not improve our lives, and they keep us feeling disappointed, frustrated, and unhappy.
And excuses have the same effect on the people we feed them to, like spouses, bosses, and friends.
When learning to manage your ADD successfully, you must be willing to stop making excuses, and start making choices.
When you make a choice, you take control. You stop being a victim of circumstance, and start being an aware and responsible person. You open the door for more learning, more awareness, and more success.
Let’s look at a practical example: You have a doctor’s appointment today, and it normally takes you 15 minutes to get there. You leave on time, but you get stuck in traffic and arrive 5 minutes late. You’re stressed out and frantic because the doctor is waiting, and you really tried to be there on time.
At this point, you can make an excuse and say “I did the best I could so it’s not my fault I’m late!” Or, “no matter how hard I try, I just can’t get to places on time!” But those excuses aren’t going to help the situation, and will probably leave you feeling even more frustrated and stressed out.
The alternative is to take responsibility and learn from the experience. “I think I need to start allowing myself extra travel time in case something like this comes up.”
You can clearly see which mind set leads to more happiness and success, and which option leads to bad feelings, stress, and overwhelm.
Choices allow you to move forward. Excuses keep you stuck in the same old place.
Happy and successful adults with ADD make choices.
Copyright (c) 2008 Jennifer Koretsky